February 23, 2018

Are we (or they) holding things back by controlling too much?

Four business people in a discussionWe tend to feel uncomfortable if we don’t have complete control of the situation we are in. And yet, sometimes – often? – we need to let go and accept that if the team as whole is going to make progress, we can’t keep a tight rein on everything.

If we have to have control, we may hold things back.

In ourselves, we perhaps need to be clearer about what discretion we truly need to retain, and be more prepared to let the group’s energies take matters forward on the rest.

I know I sometimes have needed to remind myself of that.

With others, we may need to help them see that their self-esteem or sense of self doesn’t have to be synonymous with their control of the situation. We may need to help them be content without full authority; help them be strong enough in themselves to do that, which isn’t necessarily easy.

There’s something about a true team player being ready to let go when that’s the right thing to do; to put the issue “in the middle” for all to work on together.

What about you?

How do you deal with someone holding things back by controlling too much? (Or yourself?)